by angeliska on November 26, 2002

last night my dreams were filled with wide-eyed boys, wise strangers, brilliant murderers..
a sterile doctor’s office: experiments in sound- everything is blinding white..
my brother is the doctor -my lost twin, where is he now?
(reason enough to be scared, with that one in rubber gloves)
and the other boy, almost his miniature, but so much more polite
he has his queries, and somehow he can see..x-ray vision into souls..
he tells us stories of lost ancestors, not the dead mother, but the grandmother
his young voice is husky, he’s seen it all before..
for some reason, i tend to dream about hannibal lecter relatively often.
this has been going on for several years now, and i have no explantion for it-
why my subconscious would be preoccupied with a fictional character is beyond me
other than that he represents a sort of archetype that i have always admired..
anyhow, last night we helped him escape..
it was the little things i remember- the grooves in the rope from her wrist,
the failed tug-of-war..and his deftness with hammer and nails-
you could see him taking delight in even this small act.
i never saw someone hammer so elegantly..
in the hospital waiting room, the boy tells me about the wild macaws in mexico..
he says that recently, an enormous flock of them flew into these caves..
the caves were filled with seeping subterranean gases and fermenting groundworms and larvae.
the scarlet and sapphire macaws gorged themselves on the grubs excessively.
then there was a giant, colorful explosion as the caves blew up from the strange and lethal combination of birds, fermented worms and subterranean gases..
from the sky, it looked like rainbow fireworks..
i wake as we’re being plagued by thelemic prank calls..
i can’t make any sense of it at all.

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