Giant thorny lilypads from the last days of summer.

Hello, spider.

These days are falling out of my hands-
losing ground, losing sleep over
a strange sea change, eyes below
the waterline scanning the horizon
for ghostships, for terra firma..

Despite the return of a deceptive swelter,
damnable dog days that leave one
gasping on the floor, unable to move-
a bitter tease, nasty tricks the weather plays..
Well, I didn’t quite believe it yet,
restrained myself from pulling out
the cinnamon and chenille and all.
Snow plum and white persimmon teas
to drink with nutella and rosejam, yes.
Soon, soon we shall see.
I smoke too much and sleep not enough.
Too many changes in quick succession
for wee goatly me to take in:
Will it be Vve. AET, rather than Mlle.
from here on out? Well? Will it?
The dissolution of four and a half,
five years has proved itself in the pudding.
My days are spent not in peaceful respite
behind the glass, smiling and nodding-
but instead packing up tiny Houdinis,
miniature pinheads and dentestates,
handcuffs, hourglasses, bell-jars
and the like, ad nauseam, ad infinitum..
I now wear a timepiece on my wrist
with which to count the hours.

I found an owl to complete my costume-
can you guess what I will be?
If you get it right,
you shall have more than
your share of candy corn
and mallow pumpkins, I swear.

Miss Pea made a new friend,
the lovely Pumpkinetta!
She beckons you into
my parlour..

May I also have the pleasure
of introducing the orange and
befurred denizens of our manor:
Mister Frankie Lee, Jr. and
Count October of the Infinite Darkness,
yes, the bunny- we call him Toby
as in: “Toby, or not Toby-
that is the bunny!”
If this display of interspecies love
and harmony does not incur
an acute case of spontaneous
aortal aneurysm, then you
may well be a robot.
With robot cancer.
Cancer for robots.
Any old robot will do.
(Sing along to the tune,
“Private Dancer”, please)

Yuri Lemeshev, accordionist
extraordinaire, of Gogol Bordello
also is an enormous fan of my cat.
You should be aware that my cat
is 21 years of age. He is very ancient,
but also very spry- with very loud voice!
He can buy liquor and vote and all.
I wouldn’t display him gratuituously,
except for that truly, he is exceptional-
He’s been my friend since I was five.

Can you feel the love, people?
I feel faint.